Record Store Day. And I thought the holiday people had thought of everything by now.
Independent brick and mortar music retailers came up with this one in the wake of digital everything but the kitchen sink.
(Conspiracy theory # 1: The plan was hatched in cahoots with exhausted record company execs trying to not go the way of
school teachers in California.)
Poor economy.
So on April 19, all us music fanatics are supposed to scamper down to our favorite local record store to celebrate "the culture and unique place that they occupy both in their local communities and nationally." Ummmm. OK.
And none other than
Metallica will honor this special day with an "exclusive" signing at
Rasputin's in Mountain View.
Mountain View? Why Mountain View? Kinda random that they opted to travel to a town in the nucleus of suburbia that, to my knowledge, they have nothing to do with rather than, say, something closer to their East Bay roots.
(Conspiracy theory #2: Could Metallica be ... dredging up the muck of the Napster feud with a dig to the digimusic industry aimed square at the genitals of Silicon Valley?
But back to Record Store Day - that k'ching you hear upon first learning of this jubilant event? Aint nothin' but the sweet sound of Hallmark a' calling.
"Happy Record Store Day, slacker best friend!
Here's wishing for even more time to waste hanging out at Amoeba, where we disillusion ourselves into thinking our penchant for obscure klezmer art punk rap somehow makes us cooler than others who are actually contributing something valuable to this world.
Love,
pretentious music snob”
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